Ten Days Later
Hello there! I’m going to attempt to resume regular posting now and pretend as though I do not regularly abandon the blog for days at a time 
I hope everyone had a nice weekend? Yes? No? Hope so.
So, if you recall, in my What Now? post (the Saturday before last), I contemplated how I would handle my recent weight gain and tackle my bingeing habits. I am really proud to say that I have had (overall) a great 10 days!
- No bingeing episodes (two rough days when I started to and then stopped after minimal damage)
- 7 workouts out of the 10 days (working out is not the problem for me per se but it’s of note, anyway),
- My weight was the exact same last Saturday as it was the Saturday before. (I was not expecting a loss, just hoping to halt the gain and get back into better habits.)
I have sort of eased into this, and really chilled out on “eating clean.” I have done a lot of thinking recently about my weight loss in the last two years. When I was losing the bulk of my weight, I ate very similarly to how I have eaten in these last 10 days: healthier versions of comfort foods, in reasonable portions, with occasional treats. This meant that I sometimes ate white carbs (gasp!), sometimes had wine at dinner, and often had dessert. This worked to lose 20 lbs. It was “the last 10” that I started to get really anal and regimented, which I believe is where it all backfired.
Here are my dinners for the last few days:
Baked chicken with mushroom risotto and broccoli
Organic sirloin with red potatoes and steamed veggies
Roast chicken with roasted red potatoes and parsnips, steamed veggies
And, often with dinner lately, there has been a (single) glass of this:
Eating this way has really helped. It’s not that I ate 100% clean and healthy before, but things have been in extremes this year. I was either “on,” or “off.” I forgot what it was like to eat moderately. Now I have to teach myself. Again.
I have realized that even my indulgences were not the ones that I actually wanted. Before, Matt and I would go out to Chinese food once a month and I would resume my weight loss habits the next morning. This worked. But I can count the number of times I have had Chinese food in the last year. From the day after my wedding in June 2008, to a family party the following December, I did not go out for it once. This is my favorite food, people. And I didn’t have it for six months. In the next six months, it was maybe three times. So, sure, I’ve had cupcakes and pasta and gelato. I am not saying I have been an angel. But I never actually trusted myself to eat things that I knew I LOVED.
In short, I was never physically deprived, but I think psychologically, losing the last ten pounds, I have felt deprived of many of my favorite things. Perhaps this explains the re-gain of that exact number. Perhaps it also makes me question whether the ten pounds should be re-lost at all.
Though we have recently challenged ourselves to eat out less, we are going out for Chinese food on August 14 when we go see The Time Traveler’s Wife. It is going to be a huge gift to myself and I am really looking forward to it.
Have you let yourself indulge in your favorite foods lately?
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Glad to hear you’ve been happier about your food choices, etc : ) I definitely agree and think it really is all about what works for you, and finding something that you truly can realistically live with.
Aaaaad have a great Monday!!
Ahhh, these are words I like to hear!! I’m a little of the opposite, I restricted myself too much during my weight loss period and have only started to open myself up to my favourite foods again in maintenance. Perhaps this is why I still lost 5 lbs after giving up calorie counting?
Anyways, I think you should just eat how you feel most comfortable, and maybe those 10 lbs will come off, maybe they won’t. Doesn’t matter so long as you’re happy and comfortable with your food choices
I ate a giant real beef hamburger a couple weeks ago, from a restaurant. I have no clue how many calories it had, but it was SO delicious. One year ago, I would not have been able to do something like that! And I didn’t die or explode out of my pants
(I did have a side salad with it though, no fries. Balance!!)
Enjoy that Chinese food Lara!
I’m so pleased to see that your last 10 days went so well! Allowing yourself some of your favorite foods, is an important part of recovery. If you put the focus on not bingeing and eating good foods in addition to the ones you love, and you will learn to have a healthy relationship with food. Keep up all the hard work.
Hi hun,im so so glad to hear how the last 10 days have been for you
it sounds like your relearning to eat more of what you enjoy in a way thats benefiting you mentally. way to go 
i love the idea of planning a special night out to see the movie and get some chinese..a real treat for yourself is just what you deserve
I am so glad to hear everything you’ve said here today, Lara. Esp. about realizing that 10 lbs isn’t worth the agony of deprivation. It sounds like you know what to do, and that it’s been a psychological journey as much as a physical one, and I couldn’t agree/empathize more!!
Your movie/Chinese date night sounds FAB and gives you something to look forward to!! Thanks for the update.
I’m glad to see that your last 10 days went well and things are getting a little better for you. Keep up the great work and just put the focus on you and really listen to what you want to eat. I know sometimes it’s hard – I binge too and it’s really difficult sometimes to listen to myself and what I really want. A lot of times for me it’s just emotional eating and I’m trying to figure out the best way to try to conquer that.
I really like this post! I often feel like the more ‘deprived’ I am,the more I want to EAT EVERYTHING!! I’m so glad it is helping you to relax a little and learn to enjoy things you love in moderation. Have a great Chinese dinner!!
Lara,
Sounds like you have a good grasp on where things went wrong, and I like your new plan.
As you know, I gave up dairy for the most part, but I love love love soft serve ice-cream or frozen yogurt. So, whenever CD and I go out for date night, we go to our favorite frozen yogurt shop – it’s all self serve, and they charge by weight. I’ll just say that last time Chris and I went, 2 frozen yogurts cost us over $15!!! Ha ha – mine was huge, but it makes me happy. Plus, it’s a nice treat to look forward to.
If you love your Chinese food, and it worked for you, then go for it. Life is too short, right?
PS – All your dinners look very sensible, healthy, and amazing.
I love that you are finding balance, one meal at a time!! Your dinners look and sound wonderful, the wine looks so enjoyable and you seem so much happier!
Good for you for sticking to your plan and doing well with it! The food looks great, and I really agree with you that the key to success is allowing yourself to eat what you want, when you want it. When you have a good background about what is good, bad, healthy, not healthy, you are accustomed to making the right choices, so your automatic thinking allows you to eat what you want within certain limits, ya know? Keep up the good work.
I have definitely been enjoying myself lately. Life is way too short. I hope you get to a place where you are 100% comfortable with food and yourself. You are a really good role model for being so honest in your posts Lara.
Aw sounds like you’re doing great lara! I’m reading that book right now, loove it!
Sounds like you are doing great. It is so much better to listen to your body and needs than trying to follow some other “plan” that doesn’t satisfy you mentally or physically. I truly believe in the 90/10 approach (or even 80/20 sometimes) I definitely let myself indulge in my favorite foods, even when dieting.
Glad the last 10 days went well! I love that you’re resolving to do what works for YOU!
Congratulations on your new outlook on moderation! This is something I’ve been working on a lot, too. My main issue is sugary cocktails
. So, Friday night I let myself have one mojito, and then switched to wine for the rest of the night, which I drank slowly and alternated with water! I ended up only having three total drinks over the course of the long evening, which is great considering I just graduated from college!
Great job on your accomplishments! I’ve been pretty strict with myself lately on “eating clean” but I recently let myself indulge on gelato- and it felt great! I realized I don’t need to be so strict in order to be healthy!
I’m glad the last 10 days went well for you.
I am finding more and more that for me all things in moderation works best. While I actually like “super healthy” foods, knowing that I can never have “bad” foods just doesn’t work for me. And the weight I am when I don’t eat any “bad” foods (and don’t drink any wine) is what I in theory would like to be. But that’s just it, it’s not realistic in real life. I want to be able to enjoy some wine, and fro yo, and a meal out once in a while. Also, I love to work out, but to maintain my “ideal” weight, I would have to work out more than I can (time-wise and also injury-wise – I have a weak ankle that just doesn’t do too well when it never gets any rest…).
At the same time, once I actually relaxed a bit and allowed myself some “treats” once in a while, I actually lost some weight because I was able to avoid what you could probably call binges.
Your dinners look great! Enjoy your Chinese food!
Yup! We just had our anniversary and I had whatever I wanted for dinner, which happened to be linguine with Alfredo sauce. I haven’t had Alfredo sauce in a year and it used to be my absolute favorite. Totally worth it and I don’t feel bad
So glad you’ve found a ‘happy place’ with your eating!
With my favourite foods it’s not so much what the food is but the portion size that I struggle with, i.e just indulging in a big messy scoop of peanut butter. I’m not measuring it now and enjoying every bite, but the guilt afterwards…that’s something I’m still working on.
Sounds like you’re doing great with your eating! I totally think that one glass of wine goes a long way toward making my day. It’s all about balance and happiness my friend!
I’ve overcome a huge hurdle in the past couple weeks – I used to be afraid of peanut butter (Causes weight gain for blood Type B’s) so I stopped eating it and switched to almond & cashew butters. Well, quite honestly I missed pb, said to hell with it and bought a few kinds that I am now in love with! Life is too short!
super glad to read this post. nice job these past 10 days. i love the realization of the indulgences. your post makes so much sense to me. and your dinners look spot on!! haha lately ive indulged in ALL good foods, but that is because i went to a special culinary event. not your average day for me. keep up the good work!
I like how you post the photos of your meals, makes it all more real and helps me see what a healthy meal should look like. Thanks.
Your food looks gorgeous, healthy and balanced! I am so thrilled to hear you are figuring out what works for *you*!
Hmmm, my fave foods? Top of the list is tart froyo per my post today. Yesterday I was at a b-day party right around the corner by the place I blogged about and it was all I could do not to stop. lol I am going to try to save it as a weekly treat. Maybe.
Your meals look delicious, balanced and healthy. Nice work! It’s good to make these realizations about where we’re going wrong, isn’t it? I ate chinese food last night incidentally, for the first time in months and months and months – and I also love it! It’s good to indulge in what you love. Banning things only makes me miserable!
Congrats on those awesome strides you’ve made over the past ten days! Be proud of yourself because that’s a fantastic step in the right direction
I really try to give in to what I’m craving because I know if I don’t I’ll just eat everything else first and THEN eat what I originally wanted. However, that said, if it’s really late at night, I don’t like going crazy and giving into whatever whim.
I can’t remember the last time I had Chinese food.
Congrats on 10 days of success and your rational approach to maintaining. I love you! I hope that movie doesn’t suck bc the book was SO good.
Way to go on staying on top of those 10 days.
I usually let myself indulge in a little treat in moderation. I have a huge sweet tooth so I let myself has something little each night so that I don’t over indulge when I finally do get my hands on it.
I definitely think you should enjoy the foods you love…if we don’t allow yourselves to indulge a little, I truly believe that it always backfires. What I think is great is that you recognize and are now aware of what caused you to feel deprived. Dieting, even if you weren’t really trying to diet, always backfires. Even though there are many people out there who eat “clean” 100% of the time and never stray that doesn’t mean everyone else should do the same.
What’s interesting is that I was reading an article the other day (I can’t remember where…”Self” magazine maybe?”) that said these days women are just as food-obsessed as ever and still control their food, but instead of calling it anorexia or labeling it as having an eating disorder, women get away with it because they say they are just focused on getting healthy and eating clean.
I do NOT mean to offend anyone with this comment – I’m not saying everyone who is vegan or eats clean, etc believes this, but I have found myself recently avoiding eating at certain times or NOT eating something because it isn’t 100% healthy for my body or I don’t know what’s in it, etc. I still believe that if 80% of the time you know what goes into your body and it’s healthy then 20% of the time you can indulge. It’s all about moderation and you seem to be doing great at that.
Sorry I ramble so much…
I’m so glad to hear that the past 10 days have been successful for you, Lara!
I have to teach myself in moderation over and over again too. You’d think that once we learn, we would remember to do it, but nope. I guess that’s just the way we human’s are
It’s also weird that the more strict we become, the farther away we get towards our goals. It’s hard for me to find that right balance. When do I really want something? When do I not want something? When should I start eating? When should I stop? Eek, so confusing!
I am happy to say that I have been eating my favorite foods lately—I even had actual slices of pizza (gasp) which I haven’t had in YEARS (usually I have a few nibbles + salad or I make my own at home)
Great job on food and fitness. You meals look really healthy.
I went years hardly ever eating dessert. Then I started eating it too much. Now I’mtrying to eat a small portion every day. Makes an easier balance.
i love your philosophy, and your eats look very balanced and satisfying
You know it’s very interesting at the conference I just went to they talked about serveral studies looking at individuals who had experienced food famine/lack of food like veterans, holocaust survivors, etc. They actually found that most of them do not have a normal weight now that food is available to them. They would hoard food, crave certain things, eat fast, overeat at times, became more focused on food, became chefs, etc. calling this the hunger-obesity paradox. Isn’t this interesting? I think it’s very important to have balance and have occasional indulgences in proper portions of course. That’s awesome that you have found that! I usually always crave something a little sweet after dinner or some wine on the weekends.
hayley – they were probably referring to a new term orthorexia, where clean eating consumes them so much that it can become detrimental.
EatingRD: That is fascinating! Could you do a post on that?
I don’t think I was ever necessarily “hungry” or deprived calorie-wise, but deprivation isn’t always just a physical thing, right?
Im really pleased for you, its great to hear your sticking to your goals and finding a good balance.
Its definately important to eat the foods you enjoy, if you stay clear of something and ‘forbid’ it, then you`ll just crave it all the more.
Everything in moderation as they say.
I think those meals look spot-on perfection. The perfect image of balance, nutritionals, and portion sizes. I can’t imagine eating less or stricter than that, lol!
I indulged in too much wine this weekend.
girl you ROCK that chinese food when you go to the movies! enjoy it too
you know you earned it!
Seems like you are eating very INTUITIVELY again. Just from observing from afar, this approach seems to work best for you, so keep it up!!!
so glad the days are going well! that’s so great to hear!
and yay for chinese food! i def need to indulge in my fav foods that i love…but i’ve always been so scared. one step at a time, eh?
I’m so glad things have been going well for you! Those meals look so fresh and delicious
I can completely relate to your situation. I`ve been recently so wrapped up with “eating clean” and have convinced myself it`s the key to happiness and a healthy life, yet keep making slip ups and mini-binges and beating myself up for it. I`ve started to realize that it`s about moderation, and not “giving in” but rather “having” the things that you want, and not a lot of what you don`t want.
I love your blog! I can totally relate to some of your situations and its reassuring. Keep up the good work!
Maya
http://perpetualmusings.wordpress.com
Your food once again looks great and it really does look balanced. When I started my blog and decided to call it “healthy and sane” it was because I thought you can be healthy and eat your favorite foods sometimes to stay sane. I still believe that despite my recent struggles. Actually I feel like we’re in a very similar place – things got worse and now I feel like I’m going back to basics and that’s where I should have stayed all along. You’re doing great!!
I love your food, love your mindset, and think you are so so amazing, Lara!!
Thank you for being an inspiration!!!!!!!!
Hi Lara,
For what it’s worth- I have been allowing myself to eat “real” food even if it’s not totally 100% clean, and I kid you not, I am full much longer (read: no cravings or desire for dessert) and I feel emotionally fed. Not so if I had a plain chicken breast with 5 asparagus spears. Just has been my recent experience so I thought I’d share it with you. Keep up the good work!
Deb